Hello my loves! Happy Friday!
I am hoooome from my recent water fast, and I am truly mind boggled that in just a few days it will be June. I feel like I have been living in a time warp, especially because for a total of 32 days during this quarantine I was away at the fasting center dedicated to healing Lyme, mold, and co-infections in my body. I was fasting on either juice or water for about 28 of those days, and slowly reincorporating food on the other days.
So yeah… I’ve been on quite the journey. And I am truly pretty much speechless about it which is so unlike me so that just goes to show you, I have a lot of processing to do still. A lot. But I am going to try my best to put my thoughts into words.
First of all, for people who haven’t heard me speak about water fasting before. Trust me, the first time I heard of it many years ago I thought whoever had mentioned it to me was INSANE !! TRULY !! But I hadn’t yet been in a dire position with my health where I would do anything/everything to heal my body. So reserve your judgment if you have any about this way of healing or any way of healing for that matter.
When you’ve reached the depths of pain with any sort of illness, you know the truth — you would do anything to heal and get your life back. It feels a bit like life or death, and I have been erring on the side of “death walking” for many years now so trust me when I say, a water fast ain’t no thang compared to living with Lyme every single day for years after years.
Over the years since that very first time I heard about fasting, I have learned all about the fasting way of life — and it’s not as scary as it sounds. It’s not dangerous at all when done properly (in a medical facility, getting your vitals checked daily) and can be the UTMOST healing experience in so many ways. I don’t ever recommend it to people to do, because I can only speak for myself. But for me, fasting has changed my life and truly given me my life & health back.
It puts our bodies into rest & digest mode, and allows the 75% of energy that is usually spent digesting food all day long to flow directly into healing vital organs, infections, parasites, bacteria, dormant viruses and beyond in the body. All you do while fasting is REST, which as we know is one of the number one SIMPLE & accessible healing tips in the world.
My Four Fasting Experiences //
I decided to do two back to back fasts during this quarantine for a lot of reasons. One, fasting has been my saving grace for the last few years. If you remember my first long fast I did back in 2018, it was the first and only thing that made my chronic hives and eczema go away after TEN. LONG. MONTHS. of waking up every day as an itchy, bleeding, miserable mess. See below photo for a visual.
But after that first fast I still had a long way to go. I had just been diagnosed with Lyme, mold, MCAS, co-infections, parasites, gut dysbiosis, the list goes on. Honestly I never want to type that damn list out again. It feels like it has been a part of my story for so long now and now it’s time to let go of it. But long story short, my entire life for the last 2 years (really 3, if you include the painful year before I was diagnosed) has been about healing those issues and trying to get some semblance of my life back.
That first fast was truly remarkable for me. My histamine markers went from off the charts in the 1500 range down to about 700 (still high, but HUGE improvements). I lived with those improvements for about 8 months and then in early 2019 I did another fast, and the inflammation continued to go down and I started to actually feel more like myself again. That one was incredibly deep and was perhaps the first time I realized that wait, maybe a water fast could not only feel healing and take the pain away but could actually HEAL me from my ailments.
The thing with water fasting that people always ask me is, do the benefits really last once you start eating food again? And that answer is complicated. Yes, the benefits last and there is no way to “undo” the incredible work you do for your body during a fast unless you just throw caution to the wind in a big way when you get back into food again. And even then you’re not undoing the deep work that has been done in the body, from dead cell die off and the regeneration of new cells (a.k.a the process of autophagy) to toxin die off to the deep healing and rest our bodies receive while fasting. BUT, is one water fast a cure all for a very intense chronic illness? Probably not, depending on the circumstance.
As I always say, the sicker our bodies are, the more fasts or modalities we may need to heal. Of course that is all relative and different for each person, but after my first and then my second fast when I spoke to my family about potentially doing a third, my dad said to me, “WHY would you do that if it didn’t heal you the first two times?!” which was SUCH a valid question. But in my heart I knew the answer to that… when we are extremely sick with Lyme or some kind of deep chronic illness, it’s not a one two punch. It’s a long game. It will take however long it takes, however many times it takes, to make a massive and lasting change.
At that time in mid 2019 I knew in my heart that every time I did a fast my inflammation went down significantly in a HUGE way. I also knew that fasting was one of the most physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually taxing things I had ever done — so I knew I had to be in a really stable, focused and aware place if I were to head back into a fast. That is why I have spread my fasts out over a full two year period. And to make things even more wild, my FIRST fast in 2018 and my most recent fast were on the EXACT SAME DATES of the year in May… and I only realized that about halfway through this one. If you don’t believe in the synchronicities of the universe… I beg to differ. 🙂
My Experience This Time Around //
I decided not to do a second fast in 2019 because I wanted to get strong for our wedding and just be in the best headspace possible, not necessarily in “toxin die off mode” which is incredible for healing but not really incredible for living life and trying to get married and enjoy a wedding and honeymoon! So I saved my third fast for this year, which I did in March. For more on my water fast in March, head here to read about it or here to listen! Also, I am compiling a list of questions about fasting for another pod episode so feel free to leave those in the comments below!
After stumbling across an incredible blog of someone who has now become a dear friend – a woman named Sarah who HEALED FROM LYME & put her Lyme into 100% remission by doing a long water fast – I went into my third fast with my eyes wide open to the reality that this fast could in fact heal me completely.
And after that 14 day fast in March, I really did feel healed… about 50-60% at least, which is absolutely huge when you’re suffering from an illness you have been told since day one is completely incurable. I feel that I reached states of spiritual consciousness on that fast where illness simply can no longer exist — a place of such high vibrations that my mind, body, spirit, and soul were no longer in alignment with Lyme and all that Lyme has come into my life spiritually to teach me.
And when I got home in April I really felt better than I had in YEARS. I was bouncing off the walls with energy, going on runs with my husband, making recipe after recipe and even enrolled in a plant based nutrition program to be able to teach the plant based way of life in a whole new way.
But still deep in my heart I KNEW there was more healing to be had. The water fasting doctor I had worked with in March recommended that I come back for another two week stay after about a month of eating food and regaining my strength. At first I was unsure whether or not I would do that, but after a series of incredible synchronicities (including not one but TWO of my dear friends who also have Lyme deciding on their own to do a water fast at the same facility) it felt too meant to be to pass up.
So, May 10th rolled around annnnnd I went back to the healing center. This time with a renewed purpose and a renewed sense of self and determination to heal. I KNEW I was going to heal 100% this time. I was not going to take no for an answer. And I was prepared — my last fast had been so intensely PHYSICALLY painful and I had what felt like so many near death experiences (which were really just heavily intense detox) that I was prepared for absolutely anything to happen.
(And for inquiring minds who are worried about the weight loss during fasting — of course it is part of the process, but I worked really hard to get my weight back up to my pre-fast number between the third and fourth fasts. So I lost the same amount of weight both times but ended up after all was said & done at a very healthy place for my body, SANS inflammation which feels amazing!)
This fast… which I am still finding the words for… was my deepest yet, by far. Physically, mentally, spiritually, emotionally. And the wildest part is that it flew by!!! Usually one day of fasting feels like one week, one month or one YEAR because it can be so physically painful and intolerable. But something about having my two friends there with me and being so mentally prepared for this one made every single day and then every single week fly by. It was incredible and almost made the whole thing feel like I had dreamt it by the time it was over… like it wasn’t even real.
And that doesn’t mean that it wasn’t insanely painful and difficult at the same time. The pain and difficulty were still there, but they tended to pass quicker. And I was so beyond in tune with my mind, body and spirit during this fast I knew what I needed in every moment and every day. For example I would do juice for two days, then water for two days, then juice for two, then water for four, and then really let my body decide each and every day when it was done with water and needed to go back on juice.
Pain I experienced & my tolerance this time //
Because I did these two fasts so close together, my body had less tolerance this time for long stretches of water alone. My longest period of water alone was for four days straight in the middle of this fast, then I regained strength with juice before going back on a few more days of water, then a few more days of juice. And instead of getting tripped up on the numbers or hitting any sort of daily goal (perfectionist over here), I just stuck extremely in the moment the whole time. I let the experience take over, listening to my heart and soul to the point where when my body was done I just knew. On that day I had zero ounce of regret or “maybe I can go longer” type of thoughts — I just took it for what it was worth and went back on juice and then on day 14, back on raw food.
Like I said, I am still finding the words to describe how deep and monumental this fast was for me. I journaled every day, laid on my balcony and spoke to the trees and the earth, and truly felt one with nature in the most healing way. I couldn’t look at anyone’s faces without completely seeing them shape shift, and felt SO IN TUNE with my psychic and spiritual gifts there are not even words to describe it! When you strip away all the layers, the spiritual gifts that come are beyond.
And likewise with healing, when we strip away the layers and let our bodies just BE, I believe that is when we can finally heal. Taking away the food, the stress, the medications, the daily routine, the habits, the layers, and letting our bodies do their thing, what they were MADE to do, is where healing can happen.
As far as pain this time around, I had a lot of it. For almost the full two weeks my jaw was in SEARING, excruciating, mind-bending pain, like nothing I had ever experienced in my life. My legs were throbbing the entire time too, and the joints in my knees, ankles, elbows, hands and jaw were perpetually in extreme pain. I had a migraine/headache pretty much daily, as well as horrible neck and shoulder pain. But that’s all par for the course and like all of my previous fasts, by the end of the experience… the pain lifted and I was left with less pain than ever before.
At the end of the fast I had another healing/detox reaction, which was a strep throat situation where I believe and feel my body was detoxing strep once and for all. My glands got swollen, I felt full on strep vibes, but hadn’t left my bed in weeks so there was no way for me to catch it. It took about a week, but that pain has slowly now passed through and I feel like it was my body’s final push to detox the strep virus.
And the wild thing about fasting is that even though you are in so much pain during the experience, it is still about one ONE THOUSANDTH of the pain of living with Lyme every day. Because the daily inflammation goes away during the fast and makes every moment so much more bearable. So as you read about the pain of the fast, maybe that will give you a little glimpse into what it can be like to live with Lyme on the daily and why this type of experience is so worth it to those of us who are healing.
Most importantly with each passing day of this fast I felt just a tiny bit better and a tiny bit more myself. My brain fog continued to lift and I felt like I was beginning to see the world in 5D. I was gaining massive insights every day about the best way to eat for my body, the healing powers of fruit and vegetables, the direction I want to take my brand and my life, and honestly even feeling the presence of my future babies with me every step of the way. It’s like the veil between this world and the other realms completely lifted and I was just floating in an in-between space. There are no words to describe how healing and miraculous that feeling is.
The Healing Itself //
Now I am home, and I almost feel stunned as if I can hardly speak on the entire experience. Clearly I spoke about it above but as far as the benefits and the healing that have taken place, they almost feel too sacred to even share yet. I promise I will continue sharing as I continue to find the words. Sign up for my weekly Monday newsletter here for an update this Monday, and I will continue updating you guys on the blog & pod too!
I DO feel healed, but even more so on a spiritual level than a physical level. I also feel exhausted. Weak. Tired. And sort of bummed about that and I am letting myself sink into that very real feeling. I do fasting so that I can leave feeling on top of the world, and this time I left feeling tired like I am coming to the end of a VERY long battle… which I am. So I am just giving myself space and rest while I acclimate after that experience. I am so thankful for my husband who has made our home such a safe space for me to continue healing, and has allowed me to just do NOTHING at home but lay in the bath and relax and get my strength back.
The craziest part is that I am not who I once was. Not before my third fast, or my most recent fast, and certainly not before my first two. Not before my Lyme diagnosis. Not before I have experienced multiple near death experiences from surgeries, medications, the weight of Lyme itself, and so much more. It can be hard, to be very real with you guys, to reconcile what I have seen, experienced, gained, and lost. It is not a journey I would trade for the entire world, but I certainly cannot relate to who I used to be — or the person who others were used to me being. I am now so different. And it connects me to different individuals who are also on this journey which is beautiful. It is just something I continue to work through and experience more and more of with every passing day.
This time around, the negativity (albeit minor) got to me more than usual. When I would receive a comment from someone saying, “Must be nice to be able to afford this treatment but it’s sickening that you share it because the rest of us cannot,” (but said in a much nastier way) it would hurt me to my core. Because we are all just doing the best we can. As much as I wish I could represent every single person who is healing, the best I can do is represent myself and continue to provide free information everywhere I can. And as far as treatment expenses, doing a water fast is far more affordable than even one round of stem cells, ozone, hyperbaric chamber, or any type of supplements or meds.
(Oh and don’t even get me started on the haters who say that water fasting is dangerous, when they have no iota of knowledge about the science and safety behind it.)
So for that reason as well I feel compelled to be a bit quieter this time around, as I come back into the experience of being home, healing, and feeling alive again. I promise to take you guys along for the ride when I feel up to sharing more. The most important thing here that I want to share is that healing is possible. You do not have to accept a diagnosis of “incurable.” I do not believe in that. I promise you there is another way. I LOVE YOU and would love to hear any and all thoughts and questions below. 💜 XOXOXO